January 11, 2006

The Top Ten Lies of Blogging Consultants

-inspired by guy kawasaki and hugh of gaping void

1. We're connected to the who's who in blogging.
Doc linked to me once. I have a friend who got slash-dotted.

2. We have a three-pronged blogger relations approach.
Me and my buddy made up some cool "module" names over Skype.

3. We have a specialized tool for blog monitoring.
We do what everyone else does--search Technorati. Sometimes Ice Rocket.

4. We can do for you with blogging what jib-jab did for animation
We don't have a clue what we're talking about but we sound hip.

5. We are plugged in with the women bloggers.
Dave Winer totally hates us.

6. We offer more than blogging--tools like podcasting and wikis.
We've never posted on a blog, but we read an article on podcasting

7. We're happy to ghost blog for you.
You tell anyone that and we'll hunt you down and kill you.

8. We can set you up with our proprietary RSS tool.

How stupid can you possibly be?

9. You'll need an aggregator.
We'll really aggravate you.

10. You can't afford not to blog.
You can't afford our hourly rates.


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