June 14, 2007

More on Women

So we got this young hamster girl from the pet store to breed with Marshmallow, who is the best fricking, longest living, cutest hamster in Georgia (exhibit A to your right) if not the continental U.S. He is friendly, kind, doesn't bite, potties in ONE spot only, and basically lives a sweet and quiet life with good genes and teeth.

Can you ask for much more than that in a specimen of any species? I think not.

That is why we decided--or I should say George decided--that Marshmallow's lineage must be preserved in a new generation. So he and jenna bought Cupcake and brought her home. She is very sweet. When we put them together in one cage, they got along famously.

REALLY famously.

Wooohooo type famously.

So imagine our surprise two days ago when we found Marshmallow cowering on his back in a corner with Cupcake swiping away at him.

"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME YOU NEEDY BASTARD!" she screamed.

"OH CUPCAKE--WHAT? WHAT DID I DO?"

He continued to offer her his underbelly as if to say: I know you could kill me, and I love you for it, but if it's all the same to you, I wish you wouldn't.

Clearly she's hormonal.

Another couple of incidents like this followed until we got the picture: Time to separate them--the blessed event must be getting close.

What I'm saying is, if you listen, women will tell you what they want.

And even if you DON'T listen, women will show you what they want.

And if you don't listen and don't take heed, then they will swipe at you and you will be laying face up begging for them to just not hurt you and maybe to get a cage of their own if that would be at all possible.

Then when they move next door, you go back into your plastic dome house and lay around, just like you used to before they ever showed up.

And that's kind of how it works.

Hamsters are a window on the world.

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