I remember when email felt fast, amazing, wonderous, when I waited for an email from a colleague in the early 90s back at Kodak like I used to wait for the postman to bring my American Quarterhorse Newsletter as a kid.
Oh, email was something. Oh, email was everything.
I don't feel like that about email anymore. In fact, it now takes me more time to manage (and mostly delete) incoming messages than it takes to go through my snail-mail bills, and I have A LOT of bills.
That's what I do now. I use all of my email energy to manage incoming crap, and I reserve my outgoing messages for files and communications that I need to send to clients.
In other words, I just don't email people back anymore.
And that sucks. I'm wrong for that. I know it.
I have at least two dozen messages (bolded to to make me feel guilty--tagging them as "unread" even though I've read them) that I haven't responded to. From GOOD PEOPLE. From FRIENDS. From people who even LIKE ME.
And yet, I can't bring myself to go through the envelope-sealing, stamp-licking feeling that overwhelms me when I think about writing and sending emails these days.
It was different when I had "work email" and "home email." All my good stuff came to one address. Even with SPAM, I knew there'd be treasures and I cherished that space inside my home email.
Now my homeplace is where I work, and my workplace is my home and I have Clients, Friends and Spammers knocking on my door, and I CAN'T EVEN SMOKE TO KEEP FROM GETTING CONFUSED.
Blog it and send me a link. That's all I can think to say. If you do that, I'll come across you on my ordinary and extra-ordinary routes through the net, and we'll jam out there.
Just for now. I'm sure my mind will get better. One day.
I apologize for my lack of communication. I am sorry I hate email so much. But I do. And I'm so tired.
