November 19, 2008

social allaboutMEdia or how i forgot my blog's 7th birthday

It's hard to see the forest for the trees these days. Social media pundits are punditizing themselves into such puffery that they are bursting from the very overstuffing of their grandiosity. There are more places than ever to pontificate, but blog posts still reign supreme as the bully pulpit to nowhere.

as in:

If I See ONE MORE post with BIG BOLD SUBHEADS boasting cute phrases that want so desperately to be profound that I have to turn my head to spare them their own embarrassment, I WILL puke.

I'm telling you, people.

I'm not talking polite regurgitation - I mean PUKE.

Don't pretend you have no idea what I mean.

"Think Small, Talk Deep" "Make Them Let You See Me Sweat" "If They Say Yes, You're Doing It Wrong." THOSE types of bullshitty neon nonsense.

You can tell these posts because the 'faux ballsy' subheads are most often followed by all the reasons why social media-community-internet-technology (buy my book buy my book buy my book) is the answer to every question yet to be answered under the sun, especially by business, which we all seem to forgotten, has RUN OUT OF MONEY.

That's the kind of supluferous fluff disquised as consulting genius I'm talking about.

It's the echo chamber, baby, say "hello" (ello ello ello ello)

So repulsed am I by what the conversation unleashed online back at the turn of the century - yes I was there - has become, I have managed to miss my own blog's 7th birthday.

happy birthday to me and the class of 2001.

Not for nothing, but if you think you're saying something new and interesting ABOUT the Internet with those big sweeping subheads you hope to work into a TOC for your next novella, it's time to actually DO something new and interesting BECAUSE OF the Internet. Or create something interesting and let us at it.

Because those posts--the ones with the faux-ballsy subheads--they gotta go.

happy birthday to my ass.


Anonymous said...

Head: Happy Blogday!
Sub: Read Jeneane or Die

jonathan said...

happy b'day.

I just checked mine. I missed my 10th! For manually managed html pages.*/

And coming up on 8 for my first blogger post.

Don't worry, all those hyperbolic look and me doofs will disappear in the wind that's coming, just like they did when the last internet bubble broke.

And smart people and the collegial networks that they have built and maintained will still be here.

jonathan said...

You got me feeling all nostalgically. I need to figure out some way to slap up, upside friendfeed, twitter and facebook. I spend more time doing more stuff online than ever, but my actual blog has atrophied sadly.

Jeneane Sessum said... was one of my early reads. wax on, bro. i hope you're right about getting back to actually WRITING online. and playing with friends. where's gary turner. unfamous quotes, blog fire escape, etc etc.

Anonymous said...

Congrats, that is a big milestone!

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