May 18, 2002

goin out

I'm venturing out for a while today to be by myself. Huh? Ya. Sister has the kid. A worldwide corporate newsletter waiting for me to write it. Do I need any better reason to go?

For me, working from home is an amazing arrangement. The best of both worlds. The pay and benefits of corporate life sans the politics and distractions. But it has ripple effects too. Sometimes, three or four days go by before I notice that I haven't gone anywhere. There's the obligitory drive to my daughter's school and back. I'm only half-conscious then, being it's 8 in the morning and I haven't inhaled enough coffee to make me feel undead. So I'm not sure that counts. Maybe I get 1/2 point for that. Hey, I'll take what I can get.

I mean, I go outside and everything. Don't start getting worried about me. I just forget to leave. Or maybe I'm not sure it's worth going.

For those who already have me diagnosed, it's not agoraphobia that keeps me inside my self-enforced perimeter. Ya, I could adopt that little DSM code in a minute, without trying even hard, just add it on to my others, but that's not what this is. I'm not afraid to leave. I'm more unwilling to.

My simple reality is, I don't miss the world when I'm not in it.

When webvan (god rest their souls) started working the Atlanta territory, I thought the net had made a present just for me. I'd order our groceries, pick my delivery day and time, and do the happy dance when the truck pulled up. Anyone else still get sad when they see a blue bin? Webvan brought the world to me. And it was the world I picked by hand.

Those were days, for me at least, before blogging, but they were also the days when I surrendered a big part of my life to the Internet. My work life began taking place exclusively over the net in 1997. And a lot of the rest of my life went with it. Now with blogging, many of my friends and extended family live in Blogaria, where cab fare's always free; it's a two second ride--boot up, browser open. World awaits me.

So there's not much reason to go. Out, I mean.

But today I'm going anyway. Because the world's still here, and there are people with flesh, bones, and smiles out there. Maybe wanting to talk. Maybe they even blog. Or maybe they'll be like most Atlantans, out because they have to be. Buying something or eating something. That's what people do when they go out here. And it's mandatory here that you buy everything you possibly can, and even what you can't. I think they deport you to Alabama if you fail to live up to your quota in that regard.

So, anyhow, I'm going. I'll let you know what I find out there.

No comments: