George is off to Germany to record for a couple of weeks. I'm back to the familiar alone-with-jenna life I've become accustomed to over the last six months. It's just wonderful. Really. You believe me? Well, then. Don't. I'm not having fun yet. Feeling very family-less. I miss him--I miss "us" the family of three. My life suddenly isn't what it was.
It's funny, when you're growing up you long for that family that will be better than the family you were raised in--in one way or ten.
When you're six, it's "When I have a family of my own, I won't make MY kids go to bed at 8:30."
When you're sixteen, it's "When I have a family of my own I won't run my kids' lives the way my mom tries to run mine."
For me, as a teenager, it was, "When I have a family of my own, no one will ever leave or die." (okay, so I had a little baggage.)
When I was 24, and I heard myself thinking, "This is my husband, this is our house, we're a team ready to take on the world. No one can stop us now."
When I was 36 I thought, "I have a family of my own--this is our baby girl--we're three now. We'll be together always and laugh and joke and play stupid games."
Now I'm 40 and three months, and I hear myself thinking, "Where did my family of my own go?"
