but... comments from elaine, marek, and ray went away. sorry.... wha happend???
my theory of relate-ivity
Relationships aren't individuals.
Individuals aren't relationships.
You don't relate individually, except, to yourself.
yourself. yourself. yourself.
(that's an echo)
You relate in relationships. ONLY. period.
So, I'm asking. How does it work?
Is there ever or always a third and fourth person in relationships?
You bring yourself in.
The other person brings himself/herself in.
Then each of you brings the self who works on the relationship TO the relationship -- that's the entire job of these third and fourth relationship selves. Because you need them. It's that hard.
Individually it is much easier to remain an individual. Separate from a relationship. No?
Maybe...
Individual self says:
I want my needs met = Meet them for me or I will have to meet them myself.
Relationship self says:
I want my needs met = I want to meet your needs too.
I dunno. This isn't all about love/romantic relationships. I think it stretches across friendships and blogging and work/business and all of that. Our boundaries are ever more interesting. This relating thing is getting more and more complicated as our understanding of our "selves" and "our world," and their limits or lack thereof, continue to morph.
good night.
