tony reminds me how to blog every time.
"i have the lowest self esteem of anyone you know. and i have the dumbest reason for it than everyone you know. if theres an archeologist in the house, throw ten thousand years of dirt on this blog and then dig it up and you will see that all of this was a way for me to play chess with the demons in my head and the spectacular battle almost always ends up exactly the same way as when jacob wrestled the angel - in a sore draw where both parties limp home with new names."
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