November 20, 2005

Introducing Blackster(TM)

Are you a conference planner who has trouble ensuring the right percentage of diversity at your events? Are you a pomo-web-2.0 company looking to get your groove on with that untapped demographic of color? Planning a blog meetup in your town and embarassed by that last showing of all grey-and-balding-50-something white guys with the stains on their ties?

Then Blackster's for YOU.

It's a social network, an online equalizer, and an RSS feed all at once! With Blackster, you find out how 'in' you are by how dark you link.

You may be Linked In, but are you sharing your link love with bloggers of all hues? Can you prove it the next time you get called on the carpet? Or will you try to be wiley like Tim O'Reilly?

Blackster is THE proven 'great equalizer' for the Web--and the protection you need from the bad PR of online brophobia.

AND for a limited time, if you purchase Blackster for $99.99, you get Blackster Desktop, which tailors your user experience to make you as diverse as you wanna be.

FEATURE LIST

  • Generates starter emails tailored to the darker side of your Outlook contact database.
  • Launches Real Player pre-loaded with today's hottest Rap hits.
  • Integrates seven free pre-loaded Blackster Registration Lists to ensure that your next conference meets minimum diversity standards (MDS)
  • Integrates seamlessly with blogrolling.com to populate your blogroll with blogging's HOT new melanin-enhanced talent.

AND MORE!!

  • BLACKSTER ALERTS notify you via email, pager, or SMS when your diversity quotient drops below 20% so that you can take immediate action to do what's right, not white.
  • This month only--get tips on how to get the Internet's most popular blog brothers to add you to their blogrolls without dropping $20 on Miss Clairol Mod Blonde hair color.
Investors interested in our transaction-based business model (transition to subscription / advertising model planned in 2006), please inquire with this blog's author.

BLACKSTER - 'cause once you blog black you never go back.

9 comments:

g semer said...

""...grey-and-balding-50-something white guys...""??
HEY!!!!

Jeneane Sessum said...

(shhhh--baldster is in the works...)

Frank said...

I'm thinking "fatster" for over 60 white guys with gravy stained ties from the midwest.

Ken said...

Is Blackster(TM) based on that Chickster(TM) technology? I heard that had mixed results and still hasn't fared all that well.

DeanLand said...

How about nonsters, for those who are not invited, not sure, and not quite in the club? And, btw, are white, balding, overweight, and in this case, temporarily on crutches, eligible? Of course, to certain supremacists, I don't qualify as white. But that's another rant.

Jeneane Sessum said...

Frank I'm joining yours too, minus the tie, and unless i start smoking again i'm also going for couchster--people who just don't give enough of a ** to get off the couch. Nonsters is good. NOW I HAVE SO MANY TOOLS TO BUY! And my posts will never suffer from exclusivity again.

Anonymous said...

do i get a hamster with my blackster?
-madame l.
(wiping my nose with my gravy stained tie)

Jeneane Sessum said...

Live or freshly frozen?

Frank said...

on a stick?