January 30, 2004

what's up with silk flowers these days?

My sister digs artificial flowers. I don't. I don't do well with real flowers (or anything green) as evidenced by the complete lack of plant life inside this house. Silk flowers only remind me how badly I do with real flowers, so I don't like em.

Tonight I took my sister over to the dreaded Walmart. She had surgery recently and can't drive, so Jenna and I had a fun afternoon taking my sister to the store. I had to take a phone call while we were walking around, and of course since Walmart is the size of a very large prison, and with as much mortor and steel as one, I had no reception and took the six-mile hike outside so I could hear.

When I caught up with Jenna and my sister, they were in the pretend flower isle. I was blown away by how far pretend flowers have come since I stopped even passing by the fabric and flower sectionl tucked in the back of the store. Damn. These pretend flowermakers have gotten serious.

Do you know they even have fake water droplets on the fake flowers now? It's like hyperreality. Freaked me right out. My synapses were flying fast and furious--it's a real flower, no fake, no it's real water on a fake flower, no it's fake water on a real flower. NOOOOO!

So then I went and picked out toilet paper.